There is always an up and down nature to endurance and running but gees. This isn't a post for sympathy or anything but this is a diary for me. I use this blog to remember what works and doesn't work. I look back and learn. I am wondering what I am feeling. Truth is, I don't know. The problems I am having are both mental and physical. Mental trouble surrounds my thoughts of doubt. Am I choosing goals that out of my ability? Am I training appropriately if these goals are doable? I thought that I recovered ok but my body feels worse now then a week after the marathon. I didn't even go fast or long. A few footwear mistakes and I am on the mend. I cannot pinpoint the trouble though. Is it calf? Is posterior tib? Plantar fascia? I don't know may be all of them. I didn't run more or less than usual, I didn't have anything out of the norm. Except may be running full time with sully. He has been awfully impatient with me. I don't know. May be I need a break? Back off running and focus on strengthening. Change gears but keep running to stay cardio fit. I don't feel fit or strong. I am wondering if I should back off to the half at surf city. Should I start triathlon training? I don't know, I am just in a rut. I need to get my nutrition discipline back. I need to balance out the force moving through my body and I need to get my ass in gear.